A vacation to the Mediterrean shores of Spain is experienced by two separate and unequally important groups: tourists from Eastern Europe and me. These are my stories.
We made it to Barcelona. Spent the morning at the pool since we couldn't check in until 3. Saw a lot of European butt crack (male and female). People here wear very short shorts (male and female) and have a decent amount of body hair (male and female).
We made it to Barcelona. Spent the morning at the pool since we couldn't check in until 3. Saw a lot of European butt crack (male and female). People here wear very short shorts (male and female) and have a decent amount of body hair (male and female).
Been watching the Czech MTV, great stuff. I imagine, like the Czech soccer team in our indoor soccer league, everyone on the channel smells like someone took a dump on their chest.
We're going to the FC Barcelona soccer game tonight. Ronaldinho is sitting because of a red card the previous game, so that sucks but i'm sure it will be cool anyway. We have to take the metro there, so i'm guessing we'll end up in Madrid.
Best part of the trip so far was in the cab on the way to the hotel. The cabbie, who didn't understand my broken spanish because he spoke catalan and couldn't understand why I was trying to speak spanish to him, asked us where we were going. After he and Michelle (my wife) exchanged "Hotel Arts," "Otel Arz," "Hotel Arts," "si, Otel Arz" -- Michelle let him know he was correct by saying the word "Yes" with a Spanish accent.
We'll be lucky if we get out of here without starting an international incident.
Other favorite parts:
-taxies have the word "taxi" on the side instead of the spanish word of the same meaning.
-people hate motorcyles and scooters -- I know this because our cab driver literally tried to kill two of them on the way from the airport.
-everyone here looks like Pete Sampras.
-the pool menu had a $250 lobster. I'm assuming its served with two $100 bills on the side.
-there's a giant whale sculpture next to our hotel that has no seagull poop on it. This fascinates me and is something I plan on exploring further in my conversations with the locals.
-we had to run through Philly to catch our plane, leaving my flip flopped feet with severe blisters. How do you say Eckerd's in spanish?
NFS
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